My beautiful black cat, Salem. I adopted her from a vet's office six or seven years ago. At the time, we already had one cat and my mom wasn't keen on the idea of getting another one. Salem was a titchy little thing, only five weeks old, and she and her brother had been left at a vet's office. After my aunt adopted the male, we took him to my Mom's work and I begged her to let me get his sister.

I begged and begged, even cried, because I was so smitten with that tiny little kitten. My mom finally relented and the next day, I went back to the vet's office. I made a small donation and they let me take Salem home.

As a kitten, she used to curl up on my pillow at night when I went to bed, buried in my hair and purring into my ear. She decided several months later that she wanted to be in the big outside world. She's gone "missing" a couple of times, lost outside, but she's always managed to find her way back home. A little bit ornery and persnickity at times, she is still "mi pantera preciosa" and I love her more than anything.

She'll get into a mood sometimes where she wants to just snuggle up to me and be held, she'll creep under my blankets and sleep by my side at night occasionally. She's very vocal about her needs, "miaowing" loudly when she wants something, and everyone in the house (even my uncle, who is NOT a cat fan) loves her to pieces.

My Salem is my little joy in my life.

I haven't checked in to Gaia lately, but when I saw this question in my Inbox it really gave me pause.

I've struggled with the answer to this question many times over. Suffering nearly half my life with depression, I never used to look inside because what I saw was, to me, no good. Imperfect. Ugly. Broken. Irreparable. Unworthy. Why look at that? I used to ask myself - Who really wants to see that?

Well, the answer is -- I do. I had to face the "reality" of what I saw within myself to be able to move past it. To confront it head on and learn how to manipulate it into something that I would be proud to see within myself.

This time last year, that negativity was what I saw within me. Today, I understand why I was seeing it, and I'm changing my perceptions. How?

Imperfect -- God does not ask me to be perfect, so I should not ask it of myself. He loves me just as I am.
Ugly -- In the eyes of my Father, I am beautiful. His beauty shines through me.
Broken & "Irreparable" -- My faults, my brokenness allow God a medium to work within me, leaving more of Himself in me with every crack that he mends.
Unworthy -- "For God so loved the world He sent His only Son..." Who am I to call myself unworthy in the face of such love?

I look within to remind myself of where I was and to give myself the vision of where I want to be. Knowing where I was before, and that I no longer want to believe such things of myself, tells me where I want to go - it's the building block, the foundation, of what will be my future. I think that's a pretty good reason to look within, don't you?

Cheers,

Anda.