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experiences
May 2009 
What has given you the most strength?
Posted on Jan 10th, 2009
by 
Anda
Anda
This is in Response to the Questions and Reflections for January 10, 2009:
Losing my grandmother.
Around noon on September 4, 2000, at the age of thirteen, I woke up to find my Nannie dead in her bed. Although it is the root of my depression and has affected my life in so many different ways, not all positive, I believe it has definitely given me the most strength.
I had to learn how to make it through each day without a big piece of my heart. My Nannie and I were so close that losing her was like losing a giant piece of myself. It is still, to this day, something I struggle with, but it has made me a stronger person. I went through the worst possible thing I could imagine to ever go through, and I came out of it (mostly) in one piece.
If I had the strength to do what I had to do that morning, at such a tender age, what can I NOT now, as an adult, face?
Around noon on September 4, 2000, at the age of thirteen, I woke up to find my Nannie dead in her bed. Although it is the root of my depression and has affected my life in so many different ways, not all positive, I believe it has definitely given me the most strength.
I had to learn how to make it through each day without a big piece of my heart. My Nannie and I were so close that losing her was like losing a giant piece of myself. It is still, to this day, something I struggle with, but it has made me a stronger person. I went through the worst possible thing I could imagine to ever go through, and I came out of it (mostly) in one piece.
If I had the strength to do what I had to do that morning, at such a tender age, what can I NOT now, as an adult, face?
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It is 8 years later; you are now 21, and you don’t mention if you had other family around to help you during those 8 years; death is such a hard reality check when you are so young, and raised in a society where we deny it and some (not me) even hope to eradicate it eventually; that you are a member in Gaia indicates you believe beyond the evidence of the physical world as seen through our physical eyesand there is more that cannot be seen but only felt; it is my belief that what continues to exist beyond death is the love we feel for others; her love and your connection still exist. barbara
That is so true, Barbara! I have always felt that my continuing love for her is what keeps her spirit alive. I did have other family, but after a while I think they stopped seeing just how much of a struggle it was for me and I learned that I couldn’t always turn to them.
Thanks for your comment
Cheers – Anda